The customary “annual” post
When I was a kid, I remember attending 21st birthday parties given (or “thrown” was the word) by my cousin sisters. It was THE birthday, and one of the main presents would be a little “21″ to be worn on a chain around the neck.
Much later, one of the uncles commented that while the girls celebrated their 21st birthdays in a grand manner, nothing much was heard of the birthdays after that.
For my 21st birthday, I didn’t have a grand party. Instead, I took my parents and my nanny out to dinner at a vegetarian restaurant. Mother had put that idea in my head, saying we should treat our parents to a meal because they were the ones who gave us life. Looking back, I think she said that because she never had a chance to treat her parents to a meal – she was given away as a baby, and had buried both her adopted parents during WWII, before she turned 21.
Instead of a “21″ on a chain, my sister had given me a little diamond cross on a chain, her acknowledgement of my Christian faith.
Other memorable birthdays through the years included my 31st celebrated in San Diego. My housemates had planned a surprise party for me and started to worry when I didn’t come home that evening, and when I finally did, they were not ready and one of them had to take me out to the stores cuz she needed “to get something”.
Then, there was the birthday I visited the Vietnam Veterans’ Memorial in Washington, DC on Veterans’ Day, which happened to fall on my birthday.
More recently, there was the birthday I visited my beloved giant panda family at the San Diego Zoo. Three of them were on display that day – mummy Bai Yun, son Mei Sheng and baby Su Lin – and all three of them ignored me! That evening, I’d gone to see Janis Ian in concert. What a grand way to celebrate my 48th birthday.
And now two years later, I am half a century old. I spent the hour before the stroke of midnight reading through my previous birthday journal entries, and crying at some of them.
I have to admit I am a little nervous of turning 50, of being 50. But I have something wonderful to look forward to later today. I am spending the day with mother. She may not remember it’s my birthday, and people have asked if she still recognises me. I tell them I think she does.
She greets me with a wonderful smile whenever she sees me before her. She gives me her hand when I reach out for it, and she’s not even looking at me or my hand; somehow, she senses my hand nearby. And when I put her hand to my cheek, she pats it gently, and sometimes, more than a little “gently”.
I can’t ask for anything more than to spend time with my mother, especially on the day she gave me life.
